Separation and divorce can be a difficult journey to navigate. Throw a special occasion in the mix of these emotions, like Father’s Day, and it can often complicate matters more. Here are some tips on how you can navigate Father’s Day after separation or divorce.
What if the children are not spending time with me (father) on Father’s Day?
- You could make time before or after the Sunday to spend time with the children and celebrate Father’s Day. Father’s Day is a celebration of the relationship that you have with your children. Children are more likely to cherish quality time and memories that they make with you rather than the date Father’s Day falls on.
- Consider recording the time the children spend with you on Father’s Day into a Parenting Plan or Consent Orders. Having an agreement in place for special occasions such as Father’s Day will make it easier on you and your former partner if you are both aware of each other’s expectations beforehand.
- If you can, tell your children that you are thinking of them.
- Do something for yourself that brings you joy and makes you smile. Spend time with loved ones, attend a sports game with friends, or catch a movie that you have been waiting to see.
If the children are spending time with you (father)
- Ensure that your former partner is aware of what is happening for the day. Again, this is easier if it is recorded in a Parenting Plan or Consent Order as it reduces the likelihood of any conflict arising.
- Remember, Father’s Day doesn’t need to be about gifts or anything fancy; it’s about quality time spent with your children. Make it fun. Create memories. Cherish the moments.
- Separation and divorce can be worrying and upsetting for children whatever their age, so where possible, minimise this by concentrating on them and spending quality time together.
How can Mothers support their Children on Father’s Day?
- If possible, change arrangements to facilitate the children spending time with their father on Father’s Day.
- Support your child’s relationship with their father with positive comments and highlighting their father’s strengths.
- Help younger children make or buy cards to send or give to their father. Remind older kids to buy and post cards or message their father.
- If your children are not in contact with their father, it is important not to ignore the day. Other people will be talking about it, and your children will almost certainly have questions. Give your children every chance to talk about their father. Let them know it is okay to do so.